User:Redoalien

Chris: Yo! We're coming at you, live from Camp Wawanakwa, somewhere in Muskoka, Ontario. I'm your host, Chris McLean. Dropping season one of the hottest new reality show on television, right now. Here's the deal: Forty-two campers have signed up to spend 8 weeks here at this crumby old summer camp. They'll compete in challenges against each other, then have to face the judgment of their fellow campers. Every 3 days, one team will win a reward, while the other two watch one of their own walk down the Dock of Shame, take a ride on the loser boat, and leave Total Drama Island, for good.

(Chris is now at the campfire pit) Their fate will be decided here, at the dramatic campfire ceremonies where each week, all but two campers will receive a marshmallow. In the end, only one will be left standing and will be rewarded with cheesy tabloid fame and a small fortune, which let’s face it, will probably be blown in a week. To survive, they’ll have to battle:  black flies (scene flashes to black flies buzzing), grizzly bears (screen pans down to a bear roaring and swatting at the flies), disgusting camp food (screen shows camp food)-

Camp food: Hey now!

Chris: (now back at the dock) And each other. Every moment will be caught on one of the hundreds of cameras situated over the camp. Who will crumble under the pressure? Find out here right now on… Total… Drama... Island!

(Theme song)

Chris: Alright. Now it’s time to meet our campers. We told them they’d all be staying at this 5-star resort, so if they seem a little T.O.’d, that’s probably why.

A boat passes, and lets off Beth and Owen.

Chris: Welcome, Beth and Owen!

Beth: Hi, it’s so great to meet you!

Owen: This is awesome, Chris! I am so happy to be here! WOO-HOO!

Chris: (smirks) Nice to see you both so enthusiastic! (the next boat passes and drops off Cameron and Eva) And Cameron and Eva!

Cameron: Wow! Is this a real summer camp?! I’ve never been to one before! (Eva drops her luggage on Cameron’s foot) Ow!

Eva: (simply walks over and joins Beth and Owen, who are staring at her out of fear. She notices.) What are you looking at?!?!

Chris: Next... Leshawna and Courtney!

Leshawna: Whazzup, y’all! Leshawna’s here and she’s ready to win, baby!

Courtney: Well if you plan on outlasting me, then I hope you have a pretty good game plan.

Leshawna: (turns to Courtney) What you sayin, girl? Think I can’t beat you without a strategy?! Huh! That’s right I know you don’t wanna make ME mad! (Courtney opens her mouth to speak, but Chris cuts her off)

Chris: Whoa! Save it for the challenges, ladies! (Leshawna relaxes) Next meet our spotlight seeker Dakota and homeschooled prairie boy, Ezekiel! (their boat arrives, Dakota is in the middle of talking to Ezekiel)

Dakota: (ranting to Ezekiel)…And I would’ve won the final round of the pageant but the judge said she gave me a low score because my overall personality was “snobbish” and that I was desperate for attention, I am not! (checks her phone) How come you didn’t follow me on Picstagram yet?!

Ezekiel: Uh actually, I don’t know wha-

Dakota: I TOLD YOU TO FOLLOW ME!!!! (she sees the camera, and instantly “plays it up” for the cameras) Oh, we’re already filming? I didn’t have time to do my makeup, but I don’t need it to look amazing! (she is posing in front of Chris, blocking him from the cameras)

Chris: (responding to her asking about them already filming, as he pushes her down onto the dock by the others) Yup, we have cameras set up all around camp to capture everything! (the next boat approaches with Tyler water skiing from the back) And now moving on-(he’s interrupted after Dakota once again starts posing in front of him)…Uh…Dakota?…Dakota?

Dakota: (still posing) I already know I’m pretty.

(She is suddenly pushed out of the way by Tyler flying into her, causing them both to wipe out on the dock.)

Chris: THANK YOU!!! (motions his hand over to Tyler) TYLER, EVERYBODY!! (the other campers respond with clapping, half because that was probably the most wicked wipe-out they’d ever seen, and half because he silenced Dakota, who had already began getting on their nerves)

Tyler: (moans in pain and holds a thumbs up) …E-Ex..tr-tr…eeme… (passes out completely)

(Katie and Sadie were also on the boat and are now standing on the docks as Chris introduces them. Everyone is confused with their identical outfits)

Owen: Gee, I really need to lay-off those extra spicy chile peppers. I swear I’m seeing double!

Cameron:  (even he is confused by their style) Um… what?

Chris: Meet Katie and Sadie, two peas in a pod sharing a brain that could fit inside a pod!

Katie: OMG! Sadie! We’re at a summer camp!

Sadie: I’ve always wanted to a summer camp! Eeeeeeeh!

Katie & Sadie: EEEEEEEEEEEEEHHH! (the next boat arrives, Justin stands behind them, and Sam is dropped off with him, playing his handheld game system, though he has yet to be introduced)

Sadie: I don’t think this day could get any better!

Chris: Our eye candy, Justin!

Justin: (to Katie and Sadie) Love the matching outfits!

Sadie: (she and Katie notice him and start gushing) I SOOOOO take that back! This day just got a lot BETTER! (they grab his arms and, getting jealous of each other, begin fighting until he breaks it up)

Justin: Girls, please don’t fight. I’d be happy to hold both of your hands. (they both smile happily as he escorts them, Sadie on one arm, Katie on the other, to the other side of the dock and to join the other campers.)

Owen: (staring at Justin, talking to himself): Mmmm, beefcake. (Eva who is next to Owen hears him and raises an eyebrow at him)

Eva: Uh, did you-

Owen: (starts panicking nervously) What?! NO WAY! I-I was… just uh… thinking about this delicious beefcake I ate earlier today!

Chris: Anyways… Welcome, Sam…

Sam: What? (looks up from his game) Oh, hey Chris! (looks back at his game and continues walking across the dock)

Chris: (notices Sam is about to walk right into Tyler and Dakota, who are both still passed out on the dock) Uh… Sam?

Sam: (he trips over Dakota and Tyler, falls and lands on his stomach, completely oblivious and still playing his game)

Chris: (Chris just shrugs. The next boat arrives) Bridgette and Noah!

Bridgette: (walks down the dock with a surfboard) Hey guys. What’s up? (she almost hits Eva, Cameron, Leshawna, and Courtney with it when she turns back around to face Chris after joining them.)

Eva: Hey! Watch it, blondie!

Bridgette:  (turns around again, causing her surfboard to swing by and almost hit Owen, Justin, Katie and Sadie.) Sorry.

Noah: (observes his surroundings: Ezekiel is picking his nose, Katie and Sadie are holding Justin tightly, Dakota and Tyler are still knocked out on the dock with Sam playing his video games on top of them.) This… is almost as a bad as I thought it would be.

Chris: Please welcome Lindsay! (Lindsay is sitting on the railing of her boat as it speeds in. She’s waving and smiling, until the boat stops abruptly and she flies off the railing and into the water by the dock) And Brick! (Brick, who was on the deck of the boat, sees Lindsay fall and quickly dives in after her)

Brick: I’ll save you, ma’am!

(Dakota has woken up, just in time to see Lindsay fall and Brick dive after her. Everyone is paying attention to the water now.)

(After a moment, A few bubbles come up by the dock, followed by Brick’s arm grabbing the ledge and pulling him, along with an unconscious Lindsay in his arms, onto the dock. He lays her out and gives her proper CPR procedures, and within seconds she is conscious and gasping for air. Everybody cheers at the rescue.)

Dakota: That should be ME. I should be the damsel in distress. (she attempts jumping of the dock, but Courtney and Leshawna hold her back. She struggles to break free) Let go of me!!

Leshawna: Girl, you some kinda crazy!

Lindsay: (to Brick) Y-you saved my life. Thank you.

Brick: Just looking out for a fellow soldier.

Lindsay: But I’m not a ‘fella’ or a soldier. (Noah facepalms)

Chris: Next up we have Geoff and Staci! (Geoff arrives with a boom box playing music as he dances to it. Everybody smiles in amusement. Tyler is also awake now.)

Staci: (she can barely talk over the music) My great great great uncle twice removed invented music! And his second daughter invented dancing. Before them, all people did at parties was play board games and charades.

Geoff: (dancing) That’s great, brah!! (he does a flip over the boat and lands on the dock)

Chris: Now let’s meet Sierra and Cody!

Sierra: (arrives, hugging Cody tightly) This is the best day ever! I’m sooo glad you think so too! (talking to Cody)

Cody: (wheezing) Help…me…

Chris: The Codemeister, alrighty getting tight with the ladies, I see. (Cody, puts a finger up to speak in objection, but is cut off) Save it for the rest of the cast who haven’t arrived yet while you’re getting digits. Like (the next boat arrives) Jo and DJ.

Jo: (is angrily staring at DJ, who is in front of her and hasn’t left the boat) Go already!

DJ: I-I can’t. You know how many board cracks are in that dock? I can’t risk hurting Momma’s back.

Jo: (is annoyed) Just go! (pushes him off the boat and he faceplants on the dock. She hops down next to him)

Chris: Don’t you think that was a little harsh, Jo?

Jo: He was having trouble so I… helped motivate him. Nothing harsh about it.

(Some of the campers winced and gasped in sympathy as they witnessed DJ’s “accident”. Bridgette steps up from the crowd.)

Bridgette: (helps DJ up) Dude, are you okay?

DJ: (groans) I think I got a splinter. (lifts up his face to reveal it’s covered in small splinters)

Bridgette: (glares at Jo) ‘Nothing harsh’, huh?

(Jo shrugs, as she couldn’t care less, and walks down the dock for the next campers to be introduced)

Courtney: (pulling aside DJ) Don’t worry. I know just how to take care of those splinters in a safe and painless way. (as she gets to work on DJ, another boat comes by and Lightning leaps off)

Chris: Meet Lightning and Dawn!

Lightning: (turning back to Dawn, who he was racing to the dock) HA! Nice sha-try, but I win. Lightning NEVER loses!

(Lightning pounds his fist into the dock obnoxiously, which brings annoyance to everyone else. He turns and Dawn appears right next to him, scaring him.)

Dawn: Sorry, friend. I’m afraid my prediction of the island actually being a run-down summer camp takes favor in our little bet. Pay up.

Lightning: (gives Dawn five dollars) Aw man! I sha-forgot about that. But that’s still only one loss for the Lightning! Sha-(cut off by Dawn)

Dawn: You think bragging about your achievements will make people see you as somebody people will want to be friends with, but it does just the opposite. (everybody gasps and is in shock by this. Dawn and Lightning join the others.)

Cody: Wow, that girl is REALLY something! (Sierra is still holding him tightly)

Sierra: (Sierra is now jealous but still speaks in a cheery tone) Oh Codybear! Which girl is making you think such INSANE thoughts? I’ll get rid of her for you and then you’ll be able to love me without all these DELUSIONAL confusions leading you astray. (Cody tries to escape but to no avail)

Chris: Oh…kay then…  Here comes a bunch of our cast! (the next TWO boats arrive side by side; one with B, Scott, and Liz, the other with Henry, Gwen, Izzy, and Trent. Liz is average height and has short wavy hair, dyed green. Her shirt is blue with a lizard on it. Henry is skinny/lanky in figure with short blond hair. He wears a dark gray shirt and red shorts.)

(Scott and Liz are bonding over catching animals, reptiles in specific.)

Scott: ...I always use a foam padding when handling them, just in case they pee in my hand.

Liz: I got over THAT when I was three and my brothers dared me to pick up a frog, and not wash my hands for the rest of the day.

(Scott and Liz laugh)